To find a brighter light
by Valerie Smith
Summary: Oliver Queen left Starling City three years ago. Felicity Smoak moved on three years ago. When Oliver returns from Lian Yu to find Felicity the head of IT in the corporate universe, with Ray Palmer wrapped around her finger, could Oliver and Felicity's relationship become any more complicated? How will Felicity react to losing Oliver twice? Olicity slow burn.
1. Chapter 1

The year was 2017. Oliver wiped the beads of sweat from his forehead as he ran through the forest, the terrain of Lian Yu unpredictable. His carefulness was precise, the setting sun breathed blazing fire into his silhouette, fatigue caressing his features. Oliver had been longing for a break, but moments of rest abled him to think and reminisce. Oliver Queen had left Starling City almost three years ago, when the responsibility of saving the city became too much. That's what he told himself, at least. Lian Yu was once a prison, which resembled only defeat and loneliness. Now it served him as a sanctuary, a place where he could be alone. A place where he could escape. Oliver tried to forget Starling City, his previous life. He told himself to forget the company that he could never reclaim, the sister who could never forgive him, John Diggle who would never understand why he left. Oliver Queen told himself to forget Felicity Smoak, the blonde IT girl who captured his heart so long ago, whom he could never truly be with. In recent months the soft blonde hair and bright blue eyes that had once been so clear in his memory had become blurred, her pink lipstick faint on his mind. He hated himself for that, for he couldn't truly remember those eyes that held so much trust and compassion for him. Three years ago, when Oliver made the decision to leave, he hadn't told her where he was going, or why he was leaving. He simply left. He remembered the eve of his departure ever so clearly.

—

Starling City had been free of enemies for weeks, only the average criminal every so often. The crime rate had decreased impressively and Oliver had told Felicity it was time for her to take a week or so off. That conversation, he remembered impressively.

"Oliver, I honestly don't think there is anything else to do right now," Felicity said softly into the comm.

"I'm just patrolling for tonight. Why don't you call an order into Big Belly Burger and I can pick it up on my way back?" Oliver asked, a grin making it's way across his features.

"Yeah, sure. The usual?" She asked politely, Oliver's heart skipping a few beats as he sped down the avenue on his bike.

"Always."

He arrived at the foundry approximately thirty minutes later with their dinner, placing the bag on the desk beside her series of computers and tablets.

"Eh- We've talked about not having food on the desk." As much as she forced the tone to be harsh, Oliver could tell that her eyes gleamed with amusement.

"Felicity, there are a lot of things we shouldn't have on the desk." Oliver smiled seductively, positioning himself directly behind her, moving his hand so that his fingers could string her platinum locks mindlessly and pull them aside, giving his lips exceptional excess to her soft skin. He tried not to think about all the things he could do to her on that desk, as he watched the pulse thrumming against her neck. Pressing his lips gently against her nape, but stopped suddenly as he listened to the moan that escaped her ever so pink lips. Pulling back immediately, he shook his head.

"We can't, Felicity." She turned around to face him, the rolling chair squeaked unpleasantly at the quickness of the pivot. She glared, her expression a cross between anger and hurt.

"Why do you think you can do this to me? You treat me like a toy. Only available when you want me. For the past three weeks, you've acted like this was a possibility!" She was angry, and she wasn't finished. She pointed a slim finger at him, somewhat accusingly.

"You talk dirty to me, and make me feel special, but every time you end it with, I cant, or We shouldn't. I am tired of it, all of it. I will be your Executive assistant, your IT specialist, but I refuse to be this toy you think you can play with." She finished with an exasperated sigh, blue eyes flashing to the concrete of the foundry before Oliver could see tears forming in her eyes.

"I don't know what you want me to say. We can't because you're not safe, and never will be when it comes to me. I just have to continue to remind myself of it, because I wouldn't know what to do if I lost you."

"And I need to keep reminding myself to keep learning that I can never have Oliver Queen."

The look that her gaze held in that moment, made Oliver's heart ache with such a fire he was sure he could never recover. How could someone, anyone make him feel the way Felicity did. But all he could do in that moment was look down. He lifted his gaze only to see his blonde IT girl grab her things and walk up the foundry stairs.

Later that evening, Oliver's heart sat in a pit of grief. He needed to see her. He needed to know that she was home, because she usually texted him. This night he got nothing more than silence. He parked the bike at the end of her street, making his way silently to her quiet town house, and questioned his actions immediately as he saw a white Mercedes Benz parked beside her mailbox. With his protecting instinct in full gear, Oliver attempted to inspect from all openings in the small adobe. Making his way to the back window that opened up into a small living room, the vigilante saw Ray Palmer cradling his Felicity Smoak in his arms. He watched angrily, not daring to make any movements that may disturb the intimate moment that was occurring. Oliver could see Ray Palmer whisper something in her ear, placing soft kissing against her blonde hairline. Shaking his head, Oliver brought his palms to his temple, anger pooling deep in his gut. Practically running to his bike, the playboy jumped on, roared the engine, and didn't look back.

—

Oliver continued to run until his foot caught on an extended branch, causing him to lose balance. He rubbed his temples, inhaling deeply before lowering his physique against a nearly tree. He laid his crown back, sighing deeply before letting his gaze wander to the setting sun, his heart growing weaker as she entered his thoughts once again. For the first time in three years, Oliver allowed himself to think about returning. He needed to find her, to find Felicity. Things would be different, especially if the actions of the night he left had carried into something more. But the sun sets of Lian Yu had become dull to him. Oliver needed to find a brighter light. He needed to find Felicity.


	2. Chapter 2

Felicity had just finished what seemed like a lifetime of work at Palmer Industries, running her hand through her blonde locks that were tucked neatly in an elastic, her pony tail much higher than usual. Ray had called it a night several hours ago, but she felt occupied to finish her assignment before heading to their mansion. Grabbing her empty coffee cup along with her purse, Felicity left her office and walked quickly to the parking garage. The eeriness of the company's building at night keeping her extra alert. As soon as she reached the white Mercedes Benz, she put the key in the ignition and reversed simultaneously. Several parking garage lights flickered, and she sped much faster than needed given the circumstance. Felicity laughed at herself. She would've once thought her actions silly, as the problems she used to face was much greater than an empty parking garage. She hadn't touched that side of her brain in years, the portion where she had to be defensive and be prepared to fight.

As she turned out of the garage, she flipped the stations and hummed to herself. For almost three years, Felicity hadn't made a left on the long road that lead to Verdant. Each day she almost did, but could never let herself. She halted at the stop sign, easing left only slightly before she heard the buzz of her phone encased within her purse. She saw Ray's face appear on the lock screen, and continued forward, trying to abstain from gazing in the direction of the old foundry. She had once felt so at home there, like that was where she belonged. Now she told herself it was on Windsor Drive, with Ray. There were many things she still denied herself, and one was most definitely the truth.

She pulled into the long driveway, turning off her car and taking a deep breath. Felicity played with the ring on her finger, admiring it's glow even in the low light. She maneuvered herself and belongings out of the vehicle, making her way through the intricate gardens, where Ray was already waiting for her at the entrance to their home.

"Welcome home, Felicity. I don't think that I will ever get tired of saying it." Ray smiled at her, and she returned it with a small press of her lips to his.

"And I will never get tired of hearing it." She grabbed his hand, entwining his fingers with her own.

He brought her left hand to his lips, kissing the million dollar ring that occupied her small finger. He smiled at her, and she attempted to push away the pit that had formed incredibly quickly in her stomach.

"Dinner has been ready for awhile, can I get you something?" Ray asked politely, not able to notice the change of mood.

"I'm not hungry. Obviously that is a bit unprecedented, because I can always eat a good meal. Today has been way too long and the thought of me having to stay awake an extra 30 minutes just to consume a bit of food sounds extreme." She took a deep breath, and he just nodded.

Felicity ascended the marble staircase and turned right, making her way to the master bedroom which was adjacent to the master bath. She needed to take a moment to herself. It wasn't often she got time to relax, but tonight she felt it was necessary. Felicity entered the extravagant bathroom, turned on the fireplace and dimmed the lights. She turned the nozzle warmer than healthy, and added several bath salts that she had bought the previous week. After several minutes, she stepped into the turquoise tile bathtub. Jets activated, Felicity let her thoughts wander into dangerous places. Tomorrow would mark the eve of Oliver's departure. She tried to avoid thinking about Oliver at anytime possible, but sometimes it was inevitable. A portion of your life, and your heart cannot just be forgotten. It can be suppressed, and disregarded for a period of time, but never truly leaves your memory.

Felicity had discovered this to the extremes for the past three years. She thought about him everyday, his gorgeous smile and handsome face. She missed his attitude, and passion. She missed being Oliver Queen's girl. The blonde IT girl felt tears slip down her face, guilt consuming her mind as she considered Ray. Everyday she felt as though she was apart of a battle within herself, in a war that would never end. She knew she should be loyal to her fiancé, and she was. With no doubt, Felicity loved her brilliant CEO that never failed to make her happy. But deep inside, she knew she would never love anyone more than the hooded vigilante who had become the arrow, and captured her heart.

Felicity would never forgive him for what he had done, what he had put her through. She told herself that departing without reasoning, without an explanation was the worst punishment he could've given her. Of course she knew where he went. Oliver Queen found the solutions to his problems on Lian Yu. She could contact him if she wanted, find him even. But Felicity told herself that if he didn't think she deserved an explanation, than he didn't deserve her.

But to see his face again, to look into his eyes: that would truly be her undoing. Felicity finished her bath, unplugged the drain and stepped into her soft pink robe. The blonde made her way into the bedroom through the door, checking into the hallway to ensure that she was alone. She walked down the long corridor to the enormous study. Both Ray and Felicity had a large amount of computers and devices, and the room could barely contain it. Maneuvering to the large expanse of mahogany wood that was her desk, she bent down to a small drawer to the left. Many books, magazines, and trinkets were kept within the small space, but her small hand reached down to find her Comic books.

Delicately opening, Felicity thumbed through the pages until she reached the picture that combined several years of memories into an 8x6 photograph. Felicity was sitting on her desk in the foundry, surrounded by computers. Her arms were wrapped around Oliver's neck from behind, who stood between her legs, also facing the camera. Roy was facing the camera, close beside them, pretending as though he was cupid with Oliver's bow and arrow. Diggle just smiled in the corner, his usual smirk apparent even in the photo. She closed the comic, placed it back in the drawer and closed it. She shook her head, fingers running through her loose hair.

Felicity walked back to the master bedroom, a guilty feelings overwhelming her again. She walked past the bed and flatscreen, towards the balcony that overlooked the wide stretch of property that contained ponds and gardens. Opening the door, a cold breeze made her shiver and blowed her blonde hair backwards. Her blue eyes only looked forward, as she whispered to herself. Like she had done nearly every night for three years.

"Please come back to me."


	3. Chapter 3

Oliver was surprised to find more than double the money he left in his account. It was enough for a phone call and a car rental, which is all he needed. Withdrawing the sum, Oliver found a pay phone. He had memorized John Diggle's number many years ago, and it had stayed. Dialing the digits, Oliver remembered he had a limited amount of seconds before he decided what was going to be said. Although he had been gone for three years, Oliver remembered Diggle's wise worded lectures like yesterday. A familiar voice reverberated from the ancient phone, and brought a grin to the playboy's face.

"Hello?"

"John Diggle. It's been awhile."

"Oliver Queen. Good to hear your voice again, man."

"I was hoping we could meet for lunch. Any possibility your schedule is cleared? I just have to rent a car."

John Diggle halted him immediately.

"Not necessary, Oliver. I've got you covered. I'm on my way now. Where are you?"

"Starling Bank."

"Be there in ten!" Diggle ended the call, and Oliver hung the old pay phone back on the rack.

He looked forward to reuniting with one of his only friends. Not long after the ten minute mark was reached, John Diggle himself pulled next to the curb, smiling widely as he got out of the driver's seat and closed the door behind him. One of his only trusted comrades, John reached a firm hand out to Oliver, and Oliver returned it with equal force, pulling him into a hug.

"We've missed you here, Oliver. I'm glad you've decided to come back." John pulled back, keeping his hand on Oliver's shoulder. There was a sad gleam in his eyes that Oliver couldn't place together. When Oliver gave him a questioning glance, and began to spoke, Diggle merely shook his head and replied,

"We'll discuss everything over lunch."

* * *

><p>Big Belly Burger had always been the go-to place in Starling. Normally packed and crowded, the entire joint was empty. The streets of Starling, Oliver noticed as they drove, seemed quiet. They ordered, and Diggle began.<p>

"So, how is Lian Yu?" The bodyguard looked deep in thought, his hand pressed against his jaw, pointer finger scraping his top lip.

"That obvious, is it?" A smirk appeared on Oliver's face.

"Considering that is the place you go when you think you find conclusions to your problems, Yes. My real question is, what made you feel the need to escape for three years?" His interrogation was gentle, but Oliver felt guilt.

"I needed some time." He responded flatly.

"Time for what, Oliver? Those last few months, we had it good. What changed your mind?"

Oliver had the overwhelming feeling of doubt that Felicity knew why he left. If Diggle didn't know, she surely didn't. She didn't know that he had seen her with Ray Palmer that night. She thought he had left her, the team, for no reason.

"The night I left, Felicity and I got into an argument. I went to her house later that evening, and she was in there, with Palmer." He couldn't help the disgust that followed his words. The thought of the billionaire putting his hands on Felicity made him sick.

He could tell by Diggle's reaction that something was different, but Diggle seemed to steer away from the subject.

"Women have a way of doing something odd to us, don't they?" He smiled slightly, gesturing to Oliver.

"Sara is just over three now. Lyla and I were married about two years ago."

"I'm happy for you, John." He hesitated for a moment. "How is Felicity?"

"Don't ask unless you really want to know, man." He shifted his gaze slightly.

"What is it?" Oliver felt a pit sink in his stomach.

"She's been engaged to Palmer for about six months. They moved into a big mansion not far from Palmer Industries. She has everyone fooled, living the corporate lifestyle. She's the head of technologies there, as well as executive assistant. I doubt anyone remembers her when she was just an IT girl, except us." He chuckled faintly for a moment. "Check out any tabloid anywhere near Starling. She's in it." He paused, not sure wether to continue, but Oliver nodded his head, begging him silently to continue.

"She's a lot different now, man. She definitely doesn't babble like she used to. She isn't quirky Felicity anymore. She's got Palmer and Starling City wrapped around her finger."

"I doubt she'd even remember me, then." Oliver wasn't sure what brought him to say what he did, but he wanted reassurance from Diggle that she would.

"Oliver, she misses you." Diggle replied, as they finished their meals, handing the waitress the tab.

"How do you know?"

"Felicity hasn't been to the foundry since she found out you left."

* * *

><p>John led the ex-vigilante into their former foundry after lunch. He walked down the rusted stairs, and everything seemed the same. The bed that Felicity had bough him still remained in the corner, and the fern, much to his surprise, was still alive. Diggle nodded at the plant.<p>

"Thought it would improve your return, if it stayed alive."

"Thank you, Diggle. I'm going to stay here for the next few nights."

"Don't be silly, Oliver. I have a home that you are welcome to stay in, for as long as you need."

"Please, Dig. Thank you, but I am happy here."

"Alright then. I'll check up on you tomorrow, we still have a lot of catching up to do. If you plan on staying this time, it may be smart to get an actual phone." He smiled. "I'm glad you're back, Queen."

Oliver smiled, his eyes following the silhouette until it vanished up the stairs. He noticed that Felicity's computers were layered with dust, as well as his suit and equipment. Everything else seemed like it was in decent shape. His blue eyes caught sight of the rolling chair. So many times, he had walked in on a beautiful blonde twirling her pony tail in that chair.

Anger built in the pit of his stomach. She was engaged, to Ray Palmer. It was then, that he realized the anger was not toward Felicity, or Ray. It was toward himself.

* * *

><p><strong>What? Two chapters in two days? I want to personally thank everyone so much for reading! If you find time, please review! Good, or bad, it makes me better. Felicity and Oliver will meet again next chapter, so everyone can look forward to that! xoxo readers<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

Felicity had been working late every night this week, and was completely drained. Her coffee maker had long since been drained, and her normally tight pony tail has loosened immensely, her fatigue quite obvious. She drew her elastic slowly from her hair, allowing her blonde locks to fall down her shoulders, and cascade down her back. She was still surprised at the length in which it had grown. Running her fingertips along her temples, a sigh escaped her diaphragm.

Felicity decided it was time to call it a night, finishing up the programs she had worked on diligently all day. Grabbing her things, and walking quickly through the parking garage, she was driving toward her home within five minutes. When One Republic's "I lived" blared through her radio station, she felt a small smile creep across her lips. She reached that damn stop sign again, that tooled with her emotions every single day of her life. Something was different this evening. Something pulled Felicity left on that road that evening. Moving her left hand slowly to signal, she took a deep breath, steering into the left turn lane and proceeding. She was in no hurry to push the speed limit, but was eager to get to wherever she was going.

When Felicity caught sight of the Verdant sign, even in the dying sunset, she felt memories drain her. Her heart sped up immediately when she saw one of John's convertibles a distance down the road. Not even for a moment did she think before pulling to the side of the street, and slamming her car into park so fast it could've potentially destroyed the transmission. She took a wavering breath, deep into her lungs, and slowly opened her door.

It had been several weeks since she had seen John Diggle. She had met him for breakfast with Sara and Lyla. They had small talked, discussed her job, discussed his new line of protective work, discussed Argus. He treated her much differently then she used to. Almost like she was fragile. Felicity hadn't enjoyed that, but Diggle was still like a big brother to her.

Something made her uneasy about him being here, this late. From what she last heard, Diggle didn't visit the foundry often, and when he did, it was only to water that stupid fern. It seemed so coincidental. She would never mind spending time with Diggle. She missed the part of her life that had existed three years ago.

Pulling her long black coat tight around her small physique, Felicity walked past Verdant, into the small alley. Taking the back way into the underground foundry. She was still surprised to find the club uninhabited, considering the doors were always unlocked. Fortunately, you could only find the foundry if you knew to look for it. She opened the door that would lead her down the stairs. She took another deep breath, for she had not crossed beyond that door in three years. Her hand trembled as she grasped the metal stair railing, that was not as cold as she would think. She tried her best to be quiet as she took a step down the stairs, the foundry silent beneath the flight of stairs. Several lights were turned on.

Felicity's heart pounded out of her chest as she descended the stairs, blue orbs tearing immediately at making contact with those of Oliver Queen. He sat simply on a bar stool from the level above, making arrows. She felt her heart collapse in her chest, as she could barely make out words. She wouldn't let herself fall apart before him. She would remain composed.

Oliver Queen sat simply in the tall stool, attaching the pieces of the arrow together. He didn't particularly need the arrows, but it kept him busy. The old lights flickered in the foundry, reflecting off the newly dusted technological devices, along with several desks and chairs. Diggle had washed the linens that he used for his bed, and given him several blankets.

* * *

><p>Nothing surprised the ex-vigilante more than when he heard footsteps descending the metal flight of stairs. A smile crept up on him, as he would never forget the sound of that beautiful IT girl entering the foundry. He turned around immediately, and it didn't take a genius to notice the look of shock on her face. Oliver had imagined this moment for many years, when he would finally return and she would run into his arms, and he would kiss her senseless. But those fantasies soon fainted as he noticed the diamond encrusted rock that weighed heavily on those beautiful fingers. He rose to his feet, noticing for the first time how nervous he was.<p>

He saw her hesitate, slightly confused. All Oliver wanted to do was touch her. He wanted to take her into his arms and memorize her body like he once imagined. He held himself back, eyes shifting between her beautiful eyes and the enormous stone that sat on her ring finger. He was the one to speak first.

"Felicity." He felt so stupid. After three years, that was all he could think of to say to her. Of course, he wanted to remind her that she would always be the only one, and that he loved her more than anything, and she was all he wanted to think about for three years, but couldn't let himself because he knew that Felicity needed to be with someone that could be with her. He wasn't surprised with her response, either.

"That's it? You left for three years, and that is all you can say?" She shook her head, her right hand moving from her side to her head that shook in disappointment.

"There are plenty of things I want to say to you. But I can't." He motioned with his hand to her own, that signified ownership that was no longer his, but Palmer's. "But," he added, "Congratulations."

"You can't just come back and do this to me. Come back and play the good guy. You're the one who left me Oliver. One little slip up, and you ran for the hills. Or Lian Yu. Either way, you made this decision regarding us. Not me. This was your choice, not mine. Because there was a time when you were my only choice." She meant for it to come out harshly, he knew, but all he felt in that moment was guilt.

Oliver took a few steps toward her, however she took several steps back.

"Please. I just need to know why, after all this time, why you left? Starling, Team Arrow, Me?" The look of hurt and betrayal in her eyes was almost overwhelming.

"That night, I came to your town house, and you were with Palmer, I just assumed…"

"Unbelievable. You gave up because you saw Ray Palmer at my house?"

"The both of you were getting intimate, I didn't stay around to watch."

"He came over to tell me about a meeting that would occur the following day because I had turned my technology off. But that isn't what's important here, Oliver. You didn't care enough to find out. If you had really wanted to be with me," she paused, thinking like Felicity always did. "A real man would've come in, confronted Ray, and would've tried to win the girl back. What you did was not out of love for me. You may of told yourself that you were giving me space, but you did what you were comfortable with." She stumbled, tears dripped from her eyes, but she kept herself controlled.

"You know that you're the only one I've ever wanted to be with." Oliver continued to step forward, until his body was within inches of her. He missed this heat, this chemistry that could set sparks off in the room.

"I wish I could believe that." Felicity shifted her gaze toward the floor, bringing them up to meet his eyes for just a moment. She then stepped away, turning for the stairs, her heart nearly cracking at the distance she was putting between herself and the man she once cared for so deeply it hurt. Oliver reached for her hand, turning her back around to face him. It was then his fingertips connected with the sterling silver band that encompassed her ring finger. She looked down at their hands, glancing up at him with a sad look in her eyes.

"It's too late, Oliver." And with that, Felicity Smoak walked away from him. Dropping her hand, he brought his own up to his crown, running his hands through his hair. He couldn't bring himself to watch as she made her way up the stairs and out of the foundry. He heard the door close behind her. He walked back to his desk, lowered himself to the stool, and took a heavy breath, both hands rising to caress his temples.

He didn't want to lose her again. He knew that the only person he would ever want to be with was Felicity. He was tired of denying himself. But she was right, wasn't she? He was much too late. She was engaged to be married to the man he allowed himself to leave her with. How could Oliver expect anything different? But it was different this time. This time Oliver was going to fight for the blonde IT girl. This time, he was going to get his girl. He was going to get his brighter light, the one that could harness the light that was still inside him.

* * *

><p>As soon as Felicity got into her car, she broke down. Sobs racked her body that she had deprived herself for so long. How could a single individual do this to her? How could he make her feel nothing and everything at the same time.<p>

Felicity truly believed that he still loved her. She believed everything he had said, like she always had. Once, she had believed she was so strong, and with many things she was. But when it came to Oliver, she was as sturdy as dirt in a mudslide. She had to reach for her engagement ring to remind herself where her heart truly lied. She knew she loved Ray. He was there for her when many people weren't, and he made her feel special. She was confident that his love for her was pure, and he had all the right intentions. He was perfect for her.

After minutes of thought, still parked outside the foundry, she realized she could fool everyone except herself. Her heart had always been with Oliver. But, she was stronger than this. She reminded herself that Oliver had left for three years, and who was to say he wouldn't leave again. On her drive home, she convinced herself Ray was her best choice. They were in love, corporate couple of the state. They would be happy. She pushed away the idea of Oliver, as she pulled up to her home. She walked through door, and Ray was waiting for her in the dining room.

"Hey. Another long night? You know, you're doing a great job. You don't always have to stay late. I like you here." He got up from his chair, walking over to embrace her, sliding his hands up and down her back.

Felicity dropped her things, happily placing her hands on his chest, smiling up at him.

"You've been crying? What's wrong?"

"Nothing, Ray. Just stressed." She responded, running a slender hand up his chest, toying with the strands of sensitive hair on the back of his neck.

"Maybe I can help." He grinned slyly, bringing his lips down to meet her own. She opened her mouth, tipping her head up, allowing easy access.

"I know you can." She laughed into his hair as he followed her jawline with fluid kisses of his own.

Later that evening, she laid in bed, Ray fast asleep beside her. Oliver was fresh on her mind. She remembered how much better his hands had felt on her body, how much more love had deepened their kisses. She was amazed how after three years, someone could still remember the effect that someone's lips could have on her body. Felicity was stronger than this. She wouldn't leave Ray, the man who had stood beside her, for a man, who for all she knew, could never truly be with her. She rolled over, facing away from Ray, attempting to peer through the closed blinds. She sighed, the events of the day having a heavy impact on her. She was thankful that tomorrow was Friday, and that she would have the entire weekend to speak with John, who would give her much needed advice. For now, she slammed her eyes shut, and let herself dream about what she wished for once.

* * *

><p><strong>Hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! Much more Olicity to come, but please note it is definitely a slow burn! Please let me know how I'm doing, as this is my first fanfiction, and the first time I've shared my writing with anyone! Again, thanks to the readers~<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

Felicity woke up the following morning, relieved that her attendance at work today was not her fiancee commented that she was looking extremely stressed, and recommended she stay home, Felicity didn't question it. Honestly, she was overwhelmed with the recent events. She was extremely angry with Oliver. He returned just as quickly as he had left. But truly, she was embarrassed and surprised at how quickly the feelings she spent years trying to rid herself of, came right back. One look at his beautiful blue eyes flooded her mind with memories. Memories of nights alone in the foundry, so much trust and intimacy built between his gaze and her own. But now, her trust in him wavered. He had left her, after all. Dropped everything they had shared, every moment that was their own, for three years, only to return and expect her to be fine?

Felicity pressed her slender fingertips to her temples, making her best efforts to get the continuous thoughts out of her brain. Felicity decided she would begin the day by shopping, and would eat lunch at her favorite new sushi place across from the shopping center. She combined a soft pink dress with cream pumps, sculpting her golden locks into soft waves that covered her bare shoulders. She took her time, drinking coffee and watching the news, eventually making her way to the large outdoor mall in Starling City. She parked in a spot central to all of her favorite stores, and began her search for a few new articles of clothing. Continually looking behind her, Felicity had an odd sense that someone was watching her. She casually turned to look behind her, finding no one. As she took an incorrect turn around the corner, leading her way into a dark alley, bumping into two young men who outweighed her excessively. Taking a step back, she felt chills erupt from her spine as they grinned, one reaching for her bags and the other reaching for her purse. Felicity let out a noise between a scream and an angry howl, pulling ineffectively at her belongings. One of the men pushed her to the ground, both of them then taking off with her purse and purchases. A blur shot from behind her, catching the thieves in an instant. The silhouette not only retrieved her items, but showered the two thieves with punches and maneuvers they were sure to feel in the morning. When they returned to their feet and hobbled around the corner, Felicity got up and was not at all surprised to see Oliver standing before her, bags and purse in his hands. He set her items down, walking intently to her with his hands out for comfort, but she rejected him with the slight raise of her arms.

"I knew you were watching me." Felicity told him. There was no judgement in her voice, only simple curiosity.

"I could tell. And good thing I was." Oliver said, with far more attitude in his voice than intended.

"I can take care of myself, Oliver. My bags, please." Felicity was getting agitated rather quickly at his responses.

"Evidently not." He regretted the words as soon as he spoke them, bringing his hands to his face. "Felicity- I.."

The look she returned to him made him sick, and the disappointment in her eyes was almost too much for Oliver to bare.

"Don't you dare. I took care of myself for three years, without you, without your protection. You don't get to say things like that to me. Now please, let me see my things."

"I'm so sorry, Felicity. I didn't mean it." The tone in his voice made several things clear: Oliver was not just apologizing for his last comment. Additionally, the sad look on his face truly made Felicity's heart melt. His gaze was full of desperation and, was that guilt? He walked backward to grab her things, taking only a few steps towards her. He needed her to meet him halfway.

Felicity lifted her hand to her forehead, taking a few steps towards her purse and purchases. She then raised her eyes, looking at him closely for the first time in a very long time. She looked into the eyes of the man she had once loved so deeply. As soon as her hand reached out to touch his arm, she stopped. These were the eyes of the man who left her alone for three years, who crushed her heart, who may expect her to give in. She looked away, grabbing her purse and bags of clothing. She looked at him again, emotions hidden beneath her blue eyes. "I know, thank you for apologizing."

As she began to turn around, Oliver's voice was barely a whisper. But it was enough for her to hear.

"What do I have to do to earn your trust again?"

Felicity stopped, turning around abruptly, looking at him sadly. "I wouldn't know where to tell you to start, Oliver."

With a hopefulness to his voice, Oliver said, "Can I take you to lunch?"

Felicity, for a moment, put her anger and frustrations aside. She forgot about the hurt and the pain, and willed herself to remember the good in Oliver Queen. And there was, so much good in him. Good that only she saw. Light that only few people understood. And before her he was, as handsome as ever, asking her only to take her to lunch. A man she once loved more than anything, desperate for only her trust. She felt that it was good of her to at least give him a chance. She knew all about second chances. So she nodded, waving her hand along, leading the way back to her car.

Felicity had immediately recommended the sushi place just down the road, and before they knew it they were seated with drinks. Felicity went through the motions, insisting he try several things on the menu. When the recommendations subsided and all was quiet, Felicity decided it was her turn to ask questions.

"So where did you go, for all that time?"

"I went to Lian Yu. For awhile, anyways. Travelled a little bit in China before I came back here." He sat back against the booth, his eyes never leaving hers.

"What made you come back?" She asked, eyes burning into his own.

Oliver needed to be honest with her. "I realized that I needed you in my life." He shouldn't of been so blunt, not after everything he put her through. He had allowed her to fix him and then broke her. He didn't have any right to be saying these things to her. But he couldn't stop himself. Oliver wanted her to know fully how sorry he was, how badly he regretted everything he put her through.

Felicity wouldn't have it that easily, however. "Interesting that it took you three years to realize that. And even more interesting, is that you came away from it realizing you did need me. Well I want you to consider how I felt while you were gone. How much I needed and missed you."

She was getting emotional, quickly, and he could tell. He spoke calmly, hand reaching out to cup hers on the table, hurt slightly when she pulled it away. "Felicity, I was selfish and only though about myself. I was disgusted by the thought of you being with Ray rather than me. You are the only thing I've ever wanted."

Felicity felt a tear drip from her blue gaze, not feeling bold enough, or confident enough to really look at him. "So you left me here with no choice but to be with someone else." She then looked up, a sad smile finding it's way across her face. "Because I would've always chosen you."

They were interrupted by the arrival of their food, both of their afternoons coming to a gloomy end. They spent the rest of their meal making small talk, exchanging humorous stories, somewhat like old times. After lunch, Felicity drove Oliver back to the foundry, as he had walked to the outdoor mall. She realized the distance between the destinations wasn't far at all. She put her car in park in front of the club, looking across to the passenger seat. Oliver had been silent the whole way back, and his hands were clenched against his thighs.

"Can I be honest with you?" He looked across to her, desperation hidden beneath his guard.

"Of course."

"Somehow, when I returned, I hoped you weren't with Ray. That something had happened and you realized you're too good for any man. Even though he's a better man than I'll ever be. I hoped you had waited for me, however foolish that may be." He kept her gaze, putting his hand against her cheek for several second before letting it fall. He then opened the car door, interrupted by the sound of the beautiful blonde's voice.

"Oliver?"

"Yes?"

"I've always believed you're a good man. I still do." She offered a small smile, as he closed the door behind him.

He leaned back in through the passenger window, offering only the smallest of suggestions. "If you'll allow us to talk again, you know where to find me. I've missed a lot I want you to catch me up on."

"I may take you up on that." She smiled, simultaneous to the clicking of cameras as several people took rapid photos. Oliver clenched his teeth, turning his back and walking into his sister's club. Felicity signed, rolling up her window, realization not yet setting in that her fiancee, Ray Palmer, would be soon to see the photos of Oliver Queen leaning against her car.

Ray held up the lengthy article on his laptop as Felicity walked in the door late afternoon.

He read the headline aloud:** "Oliver Queen caught spending the day with Multi-billionaire Ray Palmer's Fiancee" **along with **"Billionaire Love Triangle?" **

Felicity shook her head, "It's not what it looks like Ray. I saw him at the mall and we got lunch, and I drove him back to the foundry where they took those photos. That was all that happened, please don't overthink it."

Ray shook his head, an annoyed look obvious on his face. "I don't care that you were with him. What I want to know if how long he's been back in town? How long have you known he's been back in town? And why wouldn't you tell me." He looked betrayed, evidently. He was clearly upset, but he remained composed.

"He's only been back for a short time. I haven't known that long, and I haven't told you because I knew you would make a big deal out of it." Felicity was getting emotion for the twentieth time today, and really didn't need to be angry with Ray. But she couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry. When the tabloids question my fiancee's loyalty to me, and I realize she isn't even telling me half the truth, don't I deserve to be the slightest bit skeptical?" The tension in the room was rising by the second, and neither of them were even close to backing down.

Ray continued. "If it was anyone else, you know I wouldn't mind. But this is Oliver. The guy you loved, and the same one who left you. What business do you have going around with someone like that anyways? He's an accident waiting to happen and I don't want you going near him." Ray was angry, and he wasn't about to hide it.

"You will not tell me who I will associate myself with or not. But that isn't the point. I am engaged to you, Ray. I love you. We are together now and Oliver is just an old friend." Felicity tried to be understanding, but she was on the verge of grabbing her keys and jumping into her car.

"The only reason you're with me is because he left. Because he didn't want you. I was your second choice and I'll be surprised if you ever really wanted to be with me. He doesn't want you Felicity. How many times does he have to break your heart for you to realize that?" Ray regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. He shook his head, reaching for her, but Felicity was long gone by the time his hand reached out to hers. She grabbed her keys and wallet, and slammed the door as hard as she could before jumping into her car and driving away. She was livid, and found herself where else but the foundry. Sitting outside for several minutes, Felicity's senses returned to her and she pulled into the alley next to the club. Hiding her car from view, Felicity followed the path to the foundry. She walked down the stairs, and stood face to face with Oliver Queen.


End file.
